Throughout my studies at university, I’ve thought of ways to apply anthropological reasoning to real life. One of the biggest issues I’ve found is the definition of a relationship. At what point do people consider themselves ‘committed’?
Things may seem pretty reasonable at first glance. In conventional Western society, a (straight) relationship means both partners are ‘committed’ to each other. Exclusivity extends beyond sexual infidelity and into the realms of flirting, chatting, or even imagining. People who aren’t allowed to consider other prospects are effectively married, but either can end the relationship at any point.
This would all be justified if it weren’t for one simple, biological problem. Men don’t have as much to lose from a failed relationship. Women have a time limit through a little thing called ‘menopause’. Point is, guys can participate far longer than women in the dating cycle and still be able to start a family.
A woman ends up a bit short-changed, here. Her form of commitment is completely closing off any other options. As soon as she’s signed up to a relationship, she’s expected to be a pseudo-wife. A woman blinds herself to other prospective suitors until the relationship ends. Unfortunately, at this point, she will have used up a disproportionately greater amount of her fertile life.
This is where I pose a solution, a change of mindset. Should you be one of the many women who have been reeled into the dating cycle, consider this. If he’s not going to seal it with a long-term promise of staying – a ring or some believable alternative – he’s not committed. Men have time on their side and this lets them keep a foot in the back door. They also think they have a right to own their girlfriends. Fair’s fair, and therefore it shouldn’t be considered cheating for a girl to simply keep her options open.
To all the girls out there
Pulling out their hair
In commitment-issues despair . . .
Don’t waste time on the next empty promise.